Wednesday, May 6, 2009
How to Be a Good Friend
* Be a friend. Once you've started spending time with potential friends, remember to do your part (initiating activities, asking how the other person is feeling) or else the friendship will become unbalanced and resentment is likely to arise.
* Be reliable. If you and your friend agree to meet somewhere, don't be late, and do not stand them up. If you're not going to make it on time or make it at all, call them as soon as you realize it. Apologize and ask to reschedule. Don't make them wait for you; it's rude, and not a good way to launch a friendship. When you say you'll do something, do it. Be someone that people know that they can count on.
* Be a good listener. Many people think that in order to be seen as "friend material" they have to appear very interesting. Far more important than this, however, is the ability to show that you're interested in others. Listen carefully to what people say, remember important details about them (their names, their likes and dislikes), ask questions about their interests, and just take the time to learn more about them. You don't want to be the guy or girl that always has a better story than anyone else or that changes the subject abruptly instead of continuing the flow of conversation. These people appear too wrapped up in themselves to be good friends.
* Be trustworthy. One of the best things about having a friend is that you have someone to whom you can talk about anything, even secrets that you hide from the rest of the world. The key to being a good confidante is the ability to keep secrets, so it's no secret that you shouldn't tell other people things that were told to you in confidence. Before people even feel comfortable opening up to you, however, you need to build trust. Be honest about yourself and your beliefs, and don't gossip about others or spread rumors.
* Be there. You've probably heard of fair-weather friends. They're the ones who are happy to be around you when things are going well, but are nowhere to be found when you really need them. Part of being a friend is being prepared to make sacrifices of your time and energy in order to help out your friends. If a friend needs help with an unpleasant chore, or if he or she just needs a shoulder to cry on, be there.
Argyle Fashion: I found this cute Argyle knit with a front bow at J.Crew. com: http://www.jcrew.com
The argyle (occasionally argyll) pattern is made of diamonds in a diagonal checkerboard arrangement. The word is sometimes used to refer to an individual diamond in the design but more commonly refers to the overall pattern.The argyle pattern is said to have been derived from the tartan of Clan Campbell, of Argyll in western Scotland.
It has seen a resurgence in popularity in the last few years, due to its adoption by Stuart Stockdale in collections produced by luxury clothing manufacturer, Pringle of Scotland.
Photo: Florida State Library